Which is what we have been asking ourselves all day today!! So much needs to get done... and there just isnt enough time, or enough of us to get it all done!
My rant--
I am completely disappointed and pissed off at the fact that we have Josh living in our other house... and for some reason or another, things that NEED to get done, just arent!! So... We are basically taking care of 2 houses... and Josh is living the easy life. If someone were to give me a place to live... and not ask for a damn thing in return but UPKEEP... it would be the nicest looking place on the block... at least!!!
What also REALLY bothers me...
The boy has a 4 bedroom house to himself... and rent free. One would think he could step out of the realm of being completely self absorbed and self centered...and realize what is going on (he KNOWS what is going on...it has been discussed)... and maybe... must maybe... say "hey, I dont need all of the space I am living in... Nanny should come stay with me." OHHHH HELL NOOOO... that is the complete opposite of what he says!! (His response... "you cant do that to me"... HUH... I CAN and I WILL! Time to be the man you think you are, my dear... or move and support yourself 100%)
My mother risked my relationship with her...and the relationship she had with her other grandkids... to "save" Josh from me. He played her to the fullest. But do you think he would even think of repaying the favor??? Not at all!!
He is worried he will lose ALL of the space he has... and all of his freedom.
Well, let me tell ya something... My house... My rules! And Stacy and I have both had about all we can take of the situation!
We drove by today... and there is still a pile of trash under the deck. I guess he never got to it. I am sure the mold is still growing on the basement walls. I guess he never got to that either. AND... the weeds are still taking over the front side walk... and the borough isnt happy with it. Oh wait... He didnt get to that either!!! Along with getting a full time job... and cleaning up after himself... and many other things.
Yes, I am completely frustrated!!
I already sat and tried to figure out how to make space for my mom here... with us. And I just dont know how we would do it! Between the kids... and the dogs... and everything else... Besides... it just doesnt make sense! There is an entire house sitting in E-ville... with just Josh in it!!
There is no way I can ask or expect my mom to get rid of Fred... to live somewhere else. I mean, really?? Would I want to lose my furbabies?? HELL NO!! She has experienced enough loss!! It would be devastating to get rid of Mr Fat Cat... I mean, Fred.
Soooo much on my mind... sooooo much stress!!!
My other frustration is the fact that it seems like the weight of the world rests on mine and Stacy's shoulders. We have SOOOO MUCH going on... and SOOOO MUCH to deal with!
Two houses, unfinished projects (FRONT PORCH, his truck for the parades), putting our house back together...pool needs closed for the winter... hot tub needs drained and cleaned... dogs need a kennel run before winter sets in...
I am trying to grow a business.
I need to help my mother... and be there for her... but I am soooo far away.
Brittany is in full swing of cheerleading.
The list just goes on and on... and we are just running like chickens with our heads cut off... and when we accomplish one thing, 5 more pop up!!
The stress is about to make my eyes pop out of my head!!!
I would like to have my mom closer. That would be a huge weight lifted... from me and Stacy.
I would like to have kids that listen...and do the things they need to do without me telling them a million times!! I think their lives will be changing this week. Because I am DONE giving and not at least getting what is expected of them in return!
Tonite I have decided that Stacy and I will be making a real to do list... and going down the list to get the end result that we want. It is just so hard since there are only the 2 of us.
Ok... I guess I am done for now. I cant even get my own thoughts in order at the moment!
BUT...
I am so completely thankful for those of you that helped me help my mom!! There were times when I didnt know up from down... and I just needed to vent and keep from having my own little break down! I dont know what I would do with out those dear, close friends/family!!! Stacy and I both know we are lucky to have you!
AND...
I am soooo very blessed to have the best husband EVER!! He has really gone above and beyond this past week. Right there... keeping things in order... doing whatever was needed... and willing to do so much now, and ongoing! I love him soooo damn much!!
OK... time for more allergy meds and decongestants... and BED!!! I am totally exhausted!
Tomorrow I am on my own. Stacy goes back to work. I will have to put on my big girl panties... and face the day, the world, and all that may be thrown my way... on my own! UGH!
Good nite! Hmmm... which fur baby will we cuddle with tonite!
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